Babies, booze and a weekend recap

This weekend, I:

• Watched my boss's high-five attempt turn into a sloppy bitch slap at our holiday party. Luckily, the child she smacked was unfazed. The rest of us, however, just about died in a fit of hysterics.
  

• Learned that two of my friends are going to be daddies! On purpose! Ahhh, I'm so excited!!!
  

• Consulted the Chinese Pregnancy Calendar and determined that one friend is having a boy, one is having a girl. (Who needs an ultrasound?) The one who is having a girl can no longer tell Dave "BROS BEFORE HOES" every time he sees him.

• Learned that Dave has been on Twitter for a few months, despite the fact that he could not stop ridiculing the rest of us who've been on there. I think my trust is broken...

• Bought tons of Christmas/Hanukkah presents for my family and thus felt quite pleased with myself until I remembered that there was NO discussion of a Christmas bonus at my work party. Hey, thanks for keeping us in the loop on that one.
  

• Drank lots of wine and learned even more about it:
  

(pictures stolen from Ang)

• Started reading book 4 of the Twilight series, simply because I was told there was sex in it. After seeing the horrible movie, I've had a tough time making it through the books without picturing the complete retardation that I witnessed on screen. Hoping this will be different.
  

• Discovered that the "Christmas tree" my mom mailed to me is actually a rosemary plant that she calls "Dave's Hanukkah tree." I've mentioned she's weird before, right?

• Realized that this is my last week of work before Christmas!
  

• Realized that my birthday is 5 days away. I have very mixed feelings about this. Maybe I'll get into that later. (Though you other December babies already know the feeling.)
  

That was my weekend. How was yours?