Monday, November 8, 2010

I win.

You know how celebrities like to beat the gossip rags to the punch by blogging about some controversial story they're involved in? Or how they write their own autobiography rather than letting some unauthorized author put out a tell-all? It's all a way to take control of the situation and reveal juicy details on their own terms, in their own way.

This is kind of like that.

Minus the celebrity aspect.

You see, this morning, I found myself caught in the midst of a bit of a fib. Background: We have a big meeting every Monday morning at 9:30, which means folks start to head over to the meeting spot around 9:15.

Dave has always driven me in on Mondays after his bike ride with his cycling team (OMG, IS HE 12?), which means I typically got IN at 9:15. Even if you're not good at math, you know that this leaves me zero time to get settled, check email and mentally prep for the day.

So... I told him I had to be in by 9am sharp every Monday.

He thought that meant the meetings started at 9am on Monday.

I did not correct him.

This means that for the past few months, he's been skipping the mid-ride coffee break with his buddies in order to get home in enough time to shower and drop me off at work. WHICH I VERY MUCH APPRECIATE.

Except this morning, it may have slipped out that the meeting starts at 9:30. And always has.

His jaw dropped and he called me by my first AND middle names! "You lied to me!"

Well, no, technically, I did not. "Oh yes you did! A lie of omission!" he said.

We got into the car as he, mildly amused, continued to chastise me for this little discrepancy. I, of course, could not stop giggling. And because he wouldn't stop, I decided to do something to end the conversation.

"Look," I said, "take this $20." I reached into my purse.

"OH MY GOD, I DON'T WANT YOUR BLOOD MONEY," he exclaimed.

"Just take it!" I told him.

"No way," he said. "You're trying to pay me off. This is dirty money. I'm not having it."

And so here I am, at work with $20 still in my pocket and a meeting about to start. Also, I beat him to the punch with this story. So there.

Lisa - 1. Dave - 0.

5 comments:

Oh, Hello... said...

minus 10 points for your LIES. Lisa -9 Dave 0

Whiskeymarie said...

I get busted like this all the time as I'm terrible of keeping track of my "Marriage white lies".
This is likely why I make dinner almost every night and feel compelled to be the primary scooper of the litter box. Shame- it's a powerful drug.

TKTC said...

I love you guys. I love you so much that I might not keep your camera, even though I'm clearly tempted. This cracked me up/did not surprise me for even one tenth of one second.

Anonymous said...

I will see to it that Dave shaves his legs while drinking coffee next Monday. Why? Because he's a grown ass man and that's how he rolls.

elle michelle said...

Dave: No.

Whiskeymarie: SO powerful. Truer words were never spoken.

TKTC: I'm realizing that it will take a lot to shock you!

Anon: Once a day, I hear about how he's a grown-ass man and he'll do what he wants, dammit, so there!

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