GPOYW: Haircuts-Are-Expensive Edition

Remember when my hair looked like this?


I need a cut, badly.

Moving day is approaching

It's finally happening: I'm moving into a two-bedroom apartment.

Um, this weekend actually. (I'd better start packing.)

New apartment, new neighborhood, new possibilities -- it's all very exciting! Here's a video Dave took when we fell in love with it:

Our apartment person says there's only 1 bathroom, but there are in fact 2.

For as much as I complain about it, the place I live right now isn't really that terrible. It's a River North highrise, so take that how you will.


Things I'll miss about my current apartment

• The gorgeous view off our 51st floor balcony
• The large bathroom
  
• The large bedroom
• Picking up my packages at the cleaners in the building
• Sitting at the kitchen island while Dave cooks
• The convenience of being in River North
• Being able to take one of two express buses right up to my brother's
• The pool

Things I will NOT miss about my current apartment

• The River North tourists
• The River North attitude problem
  
• Wandering onto the Red Line only to end up in the thick of drunken Cubs fans
• Waiting for 10 minutes just to get an elevator that goes to my floor
• A super-tiny living room
• Tons and tons of spiders/bugs on the windows
• The hotel rooms across the hall, complete with loud visitors
• The douchebags at the pool
• The lure of Whole Foods

Things I'm looking forward to about my new place:

• TWO BEDROOMS
• A neighborhood with trees (and Suz)
• Easy access to Mana (and J)
  
• Room for a dining room table and therefore dinner parties
• A built-in wine rack in the kitchen
• An entire laundry room
• A fireplace
• Pizza delivery from Piece
  

Move-in date is Sunday. Let's hope this apartment ends Dave's 10-year moving streak.

When SWAT teams invade the suburbs

When you think of a SWAT team busting into a residential neighborhood, you probably think that the reason must involve intense weaponry, armed criminals, murderous escapees or some other equally dangerous plight.

In Germantown, TN (where my parents live), the reason was Coach purses.

From the local paper:

The Poplar Estates neighborhood in Germantown was enjoying a typically peaceful Saturday morning -- until rifle-toting SWAT team members started going door-to-door.

Carrying M-16 rifles, the Germantown SWAT team and other law enforcement officers scoured the neighborhood for about four hours Saturday, hunting for three Memphis men accused of robbing the Coach store in the Saddle Creek shopping center.

Police said Jonathan Allen Redd, 20, and Alonzo Jones Jr., 37, ran into the store shortly before 10 a.m., grabbed five purses worth $1,900 from a display case and ran out.

Yep. Coach purses caused the Germantown SWAT team to descend on one of the quiet neighborhoods with their rifles, uniforms and designer-purse-retrieving mission.

Do not fuck with the suburbs, ya'll.

I've always been cute. Others have not.

Me: How adorable are all my friends babies!?

Mom: SO cute!

I pause...

Me: Wait. What... I mean... What if I just THINK they're cute because I'm so close to them? What if they're really ug? Do you even know if you have an ugly baby?

Mom: Oh, yeah. Definitely.

Me: Are you sure? Doesn't every Mom think her child is beautiful?

Mom: No.

Me: Mom. Did you have an ugly baby?

Mom: Yes.

Me: OH MY GOD, WAS IT ME?

Mom: I'm not going to say.

Me: Okay, it was definitely Carrie then, otherwise you would say.

Mom: It was your brother.


BWAHAHAHAHAHA

Bad Movie Night lives on

Back in college, my brother held Bad Move Night every week (or every other week) at his apartment. His living room would be crowded with his friends and charming older sister, his bowls overflowing with popcorn, his garbage can littered with empty beer cans and his DVD player filled with gems such as:

• Jason X
• Spice World
• Collateral Damage
• The Gingerbread Man
• Death Race 2000
• Cobra

It was magical.

Now that he has moved to Chicago, we've resurrected Bad Movie Night at my apartment, in all its ridiculous glory.

The first week, we watched Ballistic: Ecks Versus Sever, starring Antonio Banderas and Lucy Liu. It was, of course, retarded and we ended up talking over it more than we actually watched it.

Next up is a repeat for BMN: Jason X. This might be one of my favorites in BMN history. Jason in space? It. Is. Awesome.

We've got a few more in the queue -- specifically Lindsey Lohan's I Know Who Killed Me and the infamously horrible Gigli -- but I'd love to hear some of your votes for worst movie ever.

Suggestions?

Anniversary #1

About two months ago, I had this great plan for our first anniversary: I was going to take Dave on a surprise trip to San Francisco.

We were going to stay downtown, drink ourselves silly at some wineries, gorge ourselves on great food, and generally overindulge on anything and everything -- exactly what a 1-year anniversary should be.

Aaaand then I got laid off.

Unfortunately for Dave, I revealed my big San Fran surprise about a week before layoffs. It kinda happened like this:


Dave: So, I was thinking about our anniversary dinner. We should go somewhere really nice.

Me: Agreed. I'll take care of it.

Dave: Okay, what are you thinking? What type of food?

Me: Um, I don't know...

Dave: No idea where you want to go?

Me: ...

Dave: What?

Me: Okay, fine, this was going to be a surprise, but I do have an idea of where we should go... San Francisco!

Cue Dave's ridiculous excitement and my feeling like a total badass.


Of course, taking an expensive trip just after being laid off isn't the most responsible idea, so we scrapped it.

Instead, for our anniversary, we threw on some jeans and went to Reza's, the first place we'd ever eaten in Chicago and the location of our rehearsal dinner. It was a beautiful night, so we sat by the big, open window and tore though a bottle of Red Zinfandel.

When we got home, we took out our year-old wedding cake and our low expectations, fully prepared to take one bite and then just trash the thing. Shockingly, it was still delicious -- chocolate cake, chocolate ganache, crushed raspberries. (Let's be honest, even if it WAS kinda bad, that's still a combination I can't walk away from.)

So, it was a low-key night, not unlike our usual nights together. That might seem like a sad thing when it comes to a celebration, but I don't think it is. Yes, jet-setting across the country would have been pretty sweet, but chilling at home with Dave isn't half-bad either. And that's really what this whole relationship thing is all about, when it comes down to it. Nothing glitzy, glamorous or over-the-top. Just us.

Happy anniversary, Dave. This write-up isn't as sweet as yours, but I think a fresh perspective on things is still a pretty good gift.

Prom 2009 Recap

Do you remember you senior prom? I remember mine...

Let's just say that Prom 2009 was WAY better!

There were decorations...

...Sweet prom dresses...

...Professionals...

...Back drops...

...Inappropriate photos...

...And even a chaperone!

All in all, definitely a night to remember!

More debauchery here.