Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Pity party, table for 1

Well, my birthday is on Saturday. As I mentioned in my last post, I have mixed feelings about this. To sum it all up...

December birthdays SUCK.

December birthdays for Jewtherans, however, suck the most. (Jewtheran = Jew + Lutheran = Hanukkah + Christmas = Me. Oy vey.)

It's not the combo birthday/Hanukkah/Christmas present as much as it is the whole feeling of inconvenience surrounding the celebration. I guess I get it, since my birthday is a bit of an inconvenience for me too. We're all busy around the holidays, making sure we get our holiday cards out on time, shopping for presents, making sure we don't forget anyone, wrapping those presents, attending parties, planning dinners, wrapping up end-of-the-year projects at work -- it's a busy freaking time. And right while everyone's in total crazed holiday mode, BAM. Birthday. It's often an "oh shit" moment.

For most birthday celebrations, it's a much different feeling/celebration because there's nothing else to focus on. We are able to not just remember the birthday, but also plan something special, put some careful thought into a birthday card and come together for one pointed event (read: drunk fest).

December birthdays are different. The plans seem more harried, the cards are an afterthought and the excitement has more to do with the almost-here Chrismahanukwanzakah. In the past, some people have forgotten to acknowledge my birthday, others run out and pick up a card ON my birthday before thrusting it into my hands. I'm not saying I'm more important than Jesus or the festival of lights, but, man, do I hate feeling like an inconvenience. And in typical first-born fashion, I simply don't want to share my birthday with the holidays anymore! Eff off holidays! My turn!

And, yes, I'm aware that all of this makes me a whiny, bratty grouch. Bah fucking humbug.

So that's how I feel about my birthday, Internet. I want to like it, but I simply don't. I'll probably be a royal pain in the ass for the next two weeks, so to keep the bitterness to a minimum, I'll do what I do best. Drinky drinky!

Another (less Intervention-worthy) option is to change my birthday to April. Nothing happens in April! No one else I know has an April birthday, there's no major holiday that month, it's not close enough to summer to be filled with chaos. April is the perfect birthday month. Might not be a bad idea... I'll think about it, and if I do feel like demanding a party, presents and undivided attention that month, I'll be sure to let you know.

17 comments:

Rachel said...

My birthday is at the beginning of June, right smack in the middle of finals week. I had 4 years of not having the time to celebrate my b-day. My 21st b-day? Writing a 9 page paper on Shakespeare.....

courtneyryan369 said...

I say change it. April is a super month for birthdays. Mine's on the 3rd. Feel free to use that day, I usually celebrate enough for several people.

Shelley said...

April is usually Easter. Better go with August. Nothing happens that month (except the 2nd is the WORLD'S GREATEST DAY!!!!)

Ray said...

My husband's birthday is December 7th. He would totally join your pity party.

K. said...

I can definitely see where you're coming from - my brother's birthday is Friday. Totally sucks!

Andy said...

I was just thinking you should change your birthday before you suggested it. Smart idea.

Mine is between the Super Bowl and Valentine's Day, i.e., "Wait, you had a birthday?"

Marie said...

A friend of mine in 5th grade had her birthday on Christmas day. Not that's definitely a bummer.

Go with May. May is WAY better.

The Alleged Ringleader said...

That would be rad if you just changed when you celebrate your birthday! You should totally do it, in April just send out an evite for it. You could start a serious trend!

Aunt Becky said...

I third, fourth, (whatever) whomever said to change the day you celebrate it. Why the hell not?

RC Fuson said...

Your husband's husband has a birthday in April. It is, in fact, as fantastic as you predict. If Dave doesn't already know what to get me, tell him I want a new career.

Your Ill-fitting Overcoat said...

That royally sucks and if you were my real life friend, I would happily support a Birthday Observed. My birthday often falls on Mother's Day and approximately 9/10ths of the people I know have birthdays within one week of me. But that still doesn't suck as much as a birthday in December.

A Super Girl said...

I think you should celebrate your half birthday!!

surviving myself said...

So I should return the bag of rocks I got you for your birthday then? I'm saying, they are some pretty nice rocks, so you should decide about this quick.

erin said...

my mom shares your birthday. and she would totally agree with you - she hates the december birthday (esp one so close to the holidays). mine is right after the holidays which kind of sucks too.

elle michelle said...

Rachel: That sucks! At least I could always be drunk on my birthday.

Courtneyryan369: April 3 sounds like a fabulous choice.

Shellbell: Damn you, always ruining my fun! I forgot about Easter...

Ray: Good, it's nice to know I'm not the only whiny party pooper.

K: Totally! But you're a good sibling to KNOW that it sucks. It means you won't forget a card.

Andy: Aw, maybe you should change yours too.

Marie: I would choose May, but Dave's birthday is in May. Maybe I'll demand that he move his so I can have that month.

Ringleader: I know, everyone seems to support this!

Aunt Becky: I'll send you the evite first so you know to get me an awesome present. (THEN you'll regret saying, "Why the hell not?")

RC: I've passed the info along. As you know, he's a good husband, so I'm sure he'll get you what you want!

Overcoat: Yeah, but that definitely sucks too. Come on over to an April birthday. I hear they rock.

Super Girl: I thought about it! But that would be May, which, like I said, is my husband's birthday month. That jerk.

Surviving Myself: Whoa, whoa, never return a bag of nice rocks. By "rocks," you mean "diamonds," right?

Erin: ALL December birthdays suck. :-(

ChiliMac said...

Since someone already covered Easter then I'll just say....Happy early Birthday! BTW, I was always jealous of my sisters birthday (Dec 26th). My mom always ended up giving her her Birthday present on Christmas and then ran out the next day for a new Birthday present.

Bobbie said...

First off, happy birthday!

Secondly, I feel your pain. Mine is at the end of November and has fallen on Thanksgiving day 3 or 4 times in my life (the last time being last year!) It's hard to plan a get together unless I do it well before or well after my birthday, because the weekend that surrounds my birthday is usually Thanksgiving weekend. Plus, I always wanted a pool party at an outdoor pool when I was a kid and could NEVER have one.

July is a good month for birthdays. The middle or end. It's warm, and it's just so much more fun to bar-hop when it's warm.

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